It strikes me that Marie Kondo's method of assessing whether or not to keep a belonging--"does it spark joy?" works extremely well for relationships of all kinds--including friendships. That thought came up as I rested after recent surgery, considering the hundreds of virtual strangers--Facebook . . .
Let's take a moment for self-examination. I do this, every so often, myself, and I thought I'd share. How do we affect others? Do they come away with smile? a good feeling? uplifted? Or do we drag them down? Are our interactions with others positive and warm? Or are they negative and dark? When . . .
Goodbye, old friends, people I have known for many years.... or fewer than many, but still not a few. Goodbye. In this new polarized world of ours we have all seen friend fall by the wayside, some horrified by how we think. Others horrified by how they believe we think. We've also made choices . . .
Safe shelter. That's all any of us are looking for in another. Being seen. I mean, really being seen. It's the beauty of our relationship with our pets, isn't it? Because they have no judgment. Nothing gets in the way of our pets seeing us at our core. Knowing us. Knowing exactly who we are. Riley . . .
I've been sorting through boxes of artifacts of my life, the things that I assumed I'd use for writing fodder in my senior years. As the years passed, I envisioned my senior years spent finishing the memoir I've worked on in fits and starts. Well, my senior years are here and writing has taken a . . .
"I have many “spouses”–men and woman who are there for me in ways my husband simply cannot possibly be. I love him, but he is not everything to me, and if I thought he was, I’d be disappointed and lonely. We have a good marriage, a tight “family” bond between the two of us, but it is rounded . . .
When a rather new friend gave me this last month, I was so touched. Because girlfriends really do matter in happy times and sad, and I'm not sure how I could live without them. But not all friends are created equal. When two longtime local friends heard my husband was having surgery, they . . .
Do you remember any particular turning point in your life? Maybe a time when you ended a bad relationship? Or left a job that no longer fulfilled you? This has been the Year of the Turning Point for me in a bunch of different ways. I've always talked big about culling relationships that no longer . . .
Normality is a well-paved street; it is good for walking, but no flowers will grow there.* I've always thought normality was overrated and still do. It's just not that interesting to me. At least not FOR me. Which is sometimes a surprise to people who meet me because I look normal. I had a normal . . .
For every friend that fades away, someone new appears or someone old comes back, in a kind of homeostasis that is undeniable. Changes in our roster of friends are just part of living --especially living a long time. If you're young and can't even imagine this, just wait. You'll see. Sometimes . . .