I miss having a mother to give motherly advice. I do. Not just on Mother’s Day, either.
Almost every day.
I miss the way my mother would nag me about every little thing.
Like, have I sent a thank-you note to Aunt Jo? Or when am I coming to visit again?
When things go wrong I miss whining to my mother, who was almost always on my side. Almost.
I miss having someone in my life who thought everything I wrote was Pulitzer-worthy. (But I’m realistic, so I only want one person in my life like that. I want the truth, too!)
Family gossip–I miss that, I do. My mother always knew the best stuff about the family and I always lived too far to be in the mix. Truth is, I didn’t want to be in the mix, but I did want to be updated. She was my connection to that kind of stuff.
I miss that she’s not here to enjoy the fact that M and I are back together. She never did get over our divorce. Oh, I know she knows, way up there in the heavens. But it would be nice to have her here, laughing with us. She’d have liked that, too.
Oh, for sure, my mother wasn’t perfect. She could be a big pain in the ass.
My ass.
Nonetheless, she was my mother and now that she’s been gone 15 years I’m starting to forget what it was like to HAVE one. She’s not around me at all, really, unlike my Father, who apparently has taken me on as his project even in the afterlife. It’s rare to see her in a dream and when I have readings, she’s not the one who is front and center.
In life, though, she was always front and center. Oh boy, was she.
I hate having to admit this, but I also miss my mother’s advice.
I do.
On certain things.
Which is why I love Becky Blades’ new book:
Buy this book for yourself or a girlfriend. Or both.
Do your laundry or you’ll die alone: advice your mom would give you if she thought you were listening is a brilliant book title and it describes perfectly the sage advice the paper-bound volume contains.
And the subtitle? Advice your mom would give you if she thought you were listening. Or, in my case, if she were alive to tell you.
This book rang my chimes in a good way.
So here are a few of the pithy pieces of motherly advice author Becky Blades offers that made me think, smile and laugh out loud more than once.
When someone asks for help, always give her something. You don’t have to give her what she asks for, but you can give her a word of encouragement, a helpful idea or a caring glance. Beautiful and kind advice that would benefit anyone.
The number one cause of guilt is doing wrong. Ok, this one made me laugh. Hard. Because it’s so right on the money!
A friend who is mad at you for taking her car keys is better than a dead friend. If a kid learns nothing else, this would be enough.
Friends don’t let friends get discount body art. True, dat. I will say no more.
Live and let live. This results in a far calmer and more peaceful life, doesn’t it?
Oh, I loved this book. And so will you.
It’s the beginning of a new year. Valentine’s Day is coming and so are birthdays of women friends we love. Or daughters.
I hope you’ll run right out and buy this cute little tome for the women you love. Maybe some have lost their own moms and would appreciate this volume even more.
And if you’re lucky enough to have a mother, this, along with a lovely card and note from you, would make a spectacular Mother’s Day gift in May.
Becky sent me a book to review but as always, my opinions are my own, and this book I recommend, with absolutely NO reservations.
Thank you – your post made me appreciate my mom even more while she is still here (she is 93 and I don’t know how much longer I will have her). It also gave me a good idea of a nice gift for my two daughters on Valentines Day.
What a great idea for a gift for my daughter. She’s a sentimental old soul. She never met her grand mom – my mother – as she has been gone for 48 years.
What a charming book! I’d give it to my mother, but it’d probably piss her off (because, let’s face it, what doesn’t?) So maybe I’ll give it to my kids instead.
Oh, Carol, I just LOVE THIS! What a sweet perspective on my little book.
I wish your mom was here, too. I’d love to read her comments on some of your articles. Especially this one!
I never thought I would but I miss the “wouldn’t it be better if”s…. What I would give for just one of those. Becky’s book sounds incredible! I am now eager to read and share it!
Love this! Now I know what to give my daughters and DIL for Mother’s Day! 🙂
P.S. Missing my mom, too. Just yesterday I was thinking about the last time I heard her say, “Diane. You should really be doing . . .” Ad infinitum. Sigh.
My mom is going to be 90 this year, I’m sure she will appreciate this book. She will probably underline what she feels is important and give it back to me!
Sounds great, Carol! I’ll have to look into it.
And whether we’re mothers or not, we all had one. In my case, it was my mother-in-law, whom I miss every day.
I am definitely going to pick this one up for my daughter! I am constantly nagging her like my mother did for me! Even though mom is still with me I do miss the mom that I could turn to when I needed someone to talk to. I miss her advice and I miss her just being mom. Thankfully I still have her though.
I’m one of the two lucky girls in this world that gets to say that Becky Blades is actually my mom, though she’s claiming many surrogate daughters lately. It’s always so nice to read other people’s takes on her wit and advice and be reminded by wonderful posts like this just how important it is to appreciate her.
Sometimes I get jealous and territorial of people taking my mom’s advice, SHE’S MY MOM – I GET HER ADVICE NOT YOU, INTERNET PEOPLE AND BOOK BUYERS!
Thanks so much for the review. Sounds like the perfect gift for my mom, and her birthday is right around the corner. Even though she drives me crazy most days, I’m glad she’s still here.
My mom has been on my mind today. She passed in 1993. She always had some piece of advice to impart on me. I think she would have definitely liked this book. This would make a great Mother’s Day gift for my daughter-in-law. Thanks for sharing.
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Thank you – your post made me appreciate my mom even more while she is still here (she is 93 and I don’t know how much longer I will have her). It also gave me a good idea of a nice gift for my two daughters on Valentines Day.
What a lovely idea!
Moms are the best! No wonder you miss yours so much. Thank you for the lovely reminder to appreciate and enjoy mine as long as I can.
Yes, even the snarky stuff is missed!
What a great idea for a gift for my daughter. She’s a sentimental old soul. She never met her grand mom – my mother – as she has been gone for 48 years.
She’ll love it. The book is really adorable.
What a charming book! I’d give it to my mother, but it’d probably piss her off (because, let’s face it, what doesn’t?) So maybe I’ll give it to my kids instead.
Oh, Carol, I just LOVE THIS! What a sweet perspective on my little book.
I wish your mom was here, too. I’d love to read her comments on some of your articles. Especially this one!
I’ve heard of this book and it sounds wonderful.
I never thought I would but I miss the “wouldn’t it be better if”s…. What I would give for just one of those. Becky’s book sounds incredible! I am now eager to read and share it!
Love this! Now I know what to give my daughters and DIL for Mother’s Day! 🙂
P.S. Missing my mom, too. Just yesterday I was thinking about the last time I heard her say, “Diane. You should really be doing . . .” Ad infinitum. Sigh.
My mom is going to be 90 this year, I’m sure she will appreciate this book. She will probably underline what she feels is important and give it back to me!
Sounds great, Carol! I’ll have to look into it.
And whether we’re mothers or not, we all had one. In my case, it was my mother-in-law, whom I miss every day.
That mother-daughter bond is a powerful thing, even when the road is rocky – or at least pebble-strewn.
My daughter starts college in the fall. This book will be great for her!
I am definitely going to pick this one up for my daughter! I am constantly nagging her like my mother did for me! Even though mom is still with me I do miss the mom that I could turn to when I needed someone to talk to. I miss her advice and I miss her just being mom. Thankfully I still have her though.
I’m one of the two lucky girls in this world that gets to say that Becky Blades is actually my mom, though she’s claiming many surrogate daughters lately. It’s always so nice to read other people’s takes on her wit and advice and be reminded by wonderful posts like this just how important it is to appreciate her.
Sometimes I get jealous and territorial of people taking my mom’s advice, SHE’S MY MOM – I GET HER ADVICE NOT YOU, INTERNET PEOPLE AND BOOK BUYERS!
But then I remember #264… Share.
Mom really does know best 🙂
Thanks for your lovely post Ms. Cassara
Great post and it sounds like a perfect book. I’m going to call my mom right now!
I can only imagine the void left behind when a parent is gone. I am blessed to still have both parents and I give thanks for that every day.
As someone in the throes of momming, I really loved hearing all the things you love/miss about your mom. She sounds like a gem.
Thanks for the tip on the book!
Thanks so much for the review. Sounds like the perfect gift for my mom, and her birthday is right around the corner. Even though she drives me crazy most days, I’m glad she’s still here.
My mom has been on my mind today. She passed in 1993. She always had some piece of advice to impart on me. I think she would have definitely liked this book. This would make a great Mother’s Day gift for my daughter-in-law. Thanks for sharing.